Joy on the T-Ball Field

Blog #23

           The t-ball game was engaging for all of the five and six year old boys, except my son.  He went to his spot on right field and plopped down. It was a beautiful June day and he just wanted to look at the dandelions in the field. He was so very happy. He pulled the flowers slowly a part and blew some of the pieces in the air. He touched them, smelled them and examined them.  He was totally absorbed.

           From the sidelines, I was encouraging him to stand up and keep his eye on the ball. I do not think he knew he was on a team or that he was playing a game. I should have been more sympathetic, because, even as an adult, given the opportunity to play softball, I, too, would have rather examined flowers. As a child, I was the last one picked for a softball team and would usually pray that the ball would not come to me.

           Yet, on this day I thought my son should learn how to be a part of a team and do what every other kid was doing.  I was not upset at all. I was laughing and, actually, thought it was cute, but I wondered why he had absolutely no interest in the All-American game.

           So many parents believe this myth.  We want our children to have “social skills” when they are young and learn to be “team players” as soon as possible. Perhaps, we should teach character in the family first and, then, test it with others later. Sometimes we try to test the child's character before it is built. I think the idea of “socializing” kids outside of the family too quickly tends to weaken or dilute values.  We coerce our children to seek acceptance by peers, before it is prudent or necessary.  Then, when they become teens, we wish we could take all that socialization back.

           If I had it to do again, I would swoop my sweet child in my arms and walk around the field looking at the dandelions with him. I would not care if he ever played t-ball, softball, basketball or any other team sport. It is just not that important in the scheme of things. I am really happy that he was able to find joy that day, in spite of me.