In My Students' Words

 Blog #31

Student:  If God created Adam out of the dust of the earth, how did He get the dust in the mommy’s stomach?

Student (whose mother put him on a strict diet for ADHD):  I eat whole wheat bread and no sugar to help my handwriting get better.

Student:  I know why I celebrate Christmas.  It is Abraham Lincoln’s birthday.

African-American Student in all-white school:  The kids are laughing at me because I am the only kid who eats brown bread in my whole class.  Can brown kids eat white bread? They said that I can’t have white bread. 

Hispanic girl in African-American school (crying):  Teacher, she said I was white.

Student:  I couldn’t do my homework, because my mommy was drinking.

Student:  I couldn’t do my homework last night, because my mom was texting.

Student:  I don’t know how many people are in my family.

Student (plopping down a handful of change): Mommy told me to bring in this money for my lunch.  Mommy said for you to count it out.  She does not know how to count.

Student:  I am not coming to this school any more.  I have to go to live with my aunt, because my mom is throwing in the towel. 

Student (little boy):  Mrs. A (another teacher) doesn’t like little boys. 

Teacher:  Your class is having a special party, so you can stay with them.

Student:  I don’t want to go to the party, I just want to be with you.

Student, with a proclivity for discipline issues:  Why did you tell my mom and grandpa nice things about me?

Student:  Teacher, your hair is absolutely lovely. I don’t know why I love it.

Student:  Grandma couldn’t come to the parent conference, because she had to go to the Free Store and watch “Jerry”. (Jerry Springer)